General Notice: Defend Your Bloody Homeland! Watch Your Allies’ Backs!
To: Any bloody git with enough mental pistons pumping to be able to read this!
Have you seen hard working auctioneers being attacked by invaders as they go about their duties? How many times have you seen a young mage — who we all know hasn’t got the strength to handle a weapon properly and can barely warm up their own hands, much less cast a decent bloody fireball — trying to help the locals out when some bloody git rides through and starts attacking said locals? What about the number of folks who just stand around like nothing’s happening while city guards get themselves carried off to be worked on by healers all night long?
And you folks are our bloody heroes?
There are fine reasons for choosing your battles with care. Sometimes you’re just too drunk to shoot straight. Or you’re engaged in planning an assault on Blackrock Mountain. Sometimes you’re too drunk to shoot straight and planning an assault on Blackrock Mountain. I suppose you may be recovering from injuries sustained in a previous skirmish, or taking goods out of your bank vault for crafting a fine piece of weaponry or what have you. I’m not asking any-bloody-body to drop whatever the fel they’re doing every time trouble comes knocking on the door.
But what of the lot that stands about when some of the folks who are just now starting to learn their craft and explore the world are yelling for help? How about you folks who sneer at the scuffle and declare the enemy to be not worth your fighting prowess? That doesn’t make yourself a hero. It makes a fine an example of useless, pompous, bloody git! I suggest finding a place where that sort is wanted. And take Fandral Staghelm with you! The elves won’t miss him. Or they’ll at least be better off without him.
Being a hero isn’t about fighting the Scourge or facing Elemental Lords. Not when you really get down to it. It’s about why you do those things. Protecting those who can’t protect themselves. Defending your homeland. Standing up and shouting, “FOR GNOMEREGAN!” or, “FOR KHAZ MODAN!” not because it has a nice ring to it, but because you’re willing to give your life in return for what your home has given yourself and to ensure that others get what yourself got. Or to make sure others get better than yourself did. To drive back the harbingers of pain and suffering, and to offer folks a safe harbor.
I’m bloody sorry if some sneaky fella with a couple of poorly made daggers isn’t as thrilling an opponent as battling armies of the undead. Fight him anyway! Do it for the wee mage panicking because she’s got no bloody clue how it is you transform an enemy into a harmless critter. Do it for the young warrior who’s just got his first decent hammer, because I promise you we’ll all be better off if he lives long enough to learn to use it properly.
Do it because, Light help me, I will go make friends with some very nasty creature and train it to bite yourself in place you didn’t know you could be bitten if you don’t!
– A Bloody Angry Dwarf